Marshanda curhat rindu anak, balasan Ben Kasyafani ini bikin haru

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Hoopsbyhudy.com – Usai bercerai dengan Ben Kasyafani, Marshanda harus rela melepaskan putri semata wayangnya kepada mantan suaminya itu. Keputusan pengadilan menyebutkan Ben Kasyafani mendapat hak asuh putri kecilnya, Sienna Ameerah Kasyafani. Kini bocah yang lahir pada 22 Januari 2013 ini tinggal bersama Ben dan istri barunya Nesyana Ayu Nabila.

Ben dan Marshanda bercerai pada tahun 2014. Sebagai seorang ibu, Marshanda merasa kehilangan sosok buah hatinya. Ia begitu merindukan kehadiran Sienna di kehidupannya. Marshanda pun baru-baru ini menuliskan curahan hatinya lewat akun Instagram pada kemarin Minggu (15/4).

foto: Instagram/@marshanda99

-Part 1 of 1-
.
What can I do
I am guilty
Of losing you.
.
What can i do
I am guilty
Not blaming my illness but that is my weakness.
.
I got lost.
And nobody wins when they tried to save me from falling.
I had to fall. Says God.
.
And until today I cant see why I had to.
Cause it got me losing you.
.
I am guilty and I am ashamed.
People talk about me behind my back.
Saying I can’t bear sanity.
I can’t bear life.
Because I am ill.
.
And now what should I do.
When all I can think about is the thought of losing you.
My daughter.
.
And I miss you, everyday.
And I cry for you, everyday.
I am lost. And in this case I am lost forever.
.
I can only hope and pray for miracle.
I dont even believe that I still deserve the feeling of hope.
I’ve made too big of a mistake.
.
I am left with questions and tears.
I saw people around me.
Being allowed to be with their children.
Pushing me far away from the right self-concept I am supposed to have about myself.
Pushing me far away from seeing myself as a capable human being. Capable of being a mother.
.
I have lost.
I’ve lost you and I lost everything.
And I‘ve forgotten how to have hope.
Tried to understand this chapter of life.
And I can’t understand a thing.
The inner wisdom I usually find in me, is in silence.
.
God help me.
I am lost.
I am ashamed.
What are You trying to tell me?
I am lost.
And everybody talks behind my back.
About how it is normal for me to lose.
How it makes sense.
.
So I just try to bear with the thought of living with my worst self.
The incapable human. The inadequate parent. The one nobody can trust.
And carry on.
And carry on.
And carry on.,” curhat Marshanda pada postingannya dalam bentuk puisi.

Tak hanya sekali, pemain sinetron ‘Orang Ketiga’ ini kembali menuliskan curahan hatinya tentang kerinduan hatinya dengan sang anak, Sienna Ameerah Kasyafani.

foto: Instagram/@marshanda99



-Part 2 of 2-
.
The caption on my last post (right before this one), is not shared only because I miss my daughter who doesn’t live with me since my divorce three years ago. But I also want to share a writing that‘s written with honesty dan vulnerability.
.
I posted it not only to share my honest expression, but also with a genuine hope that some of you will feel relieved and inspired, karena tau bahwa ada orang lain diluar sana yang juga struggle karena akibat-akibat dari memiliki mental illness.
.
Hope some of you can relate to this and give others like us some strength, empowerment, and love. Apapun masalah yg teman-teman sedang hadapi in life, I hope you realize that we can fall down and cry. But, we have the strength to get up and fight again to have happiness and love again in our lives. Find the way.. dont stop fighting, and carry on. No matter how hard it is. Carry on.

Postingan wanita yang akrab disapa Chacha ini mendapat dukungan dari rekan sesama selebriti seperti Nia Ramadhani hingga Kirana Larasati.

BACA Juga :   8 Kreasi cookies mirip benda ini hasilnya bisa bikin kamu terkecoh

“Be strong!!! HARUS! Dan BISA! Kamu udah lakukan semua usaha yang kamu bisa untuk bisa tinggal bareng Sienna,udah ga ada lagi yang bisa kamu lakukan, sekarang waktunya serahin sama Tuhan. ALLAH tau APA yang terbaik buat kamu, dan KAPAN waktu yang tepat untuk itu terjadi. #pelukkk,” tulis Nia Ramadhani pada postingan Marshanda.

“LOVE YOU SAYANG. HUGS,” tulis Naysila Mirdad dengan caplock

Hal senada juga disampaikan oleh Kirana Larasati, “hang in there, Ca. Rest your head.”

foto: Instagram/@marshanda99

Postingan Marshanda ini mendapat respons dari mantan suaminya, Ben Kasyafani. Melalui kolom komentar, Ben membalas postingan Marshanda.